This Fathers Action Network (FAN), a newly formed network is funded by the Ministry of Community Development, Youth and Sports (MCYS).
FAN is to drive the "Dads for Life Movement" that aims to get fathers more involved with their children.
Mr Richard Seow, the chairman of FAN, says that FAN want to make people aware issues of fatherhood, and to get them to make a commitment to spend time with their family and kids.
Mr Seow further said that " Whether it's values, work ethic or sex education, you can't expect schools to take over. Don't outsource the fathering, don't let Game Boy or the Xbox take away the time the father should be spending with the child".
I totally agree with the statement above.
During our younger days, our fathers are busy working and our mothers are solely responsible for our upbringing but there are also fathers who still managed to spend sufficient time with their children.
Unfortunately, I was brought up by mainly by grandma and aunties in Penang as my parents lived all over Malaysia due to his job postings. As there were less external distractions and having a very strict grandma, my siblings and I turned out reasonably well.
But having said that, we do not have many memories of times we spent with our parents. Sad but this was due to the circumstances then.
Glad to say that my siblings & I are spending much more time with our own children.
However, it is still very true that the husband is seen as the one working his ass off to bring home the bacon.
And many fathers think that it is not their responsible to care for their children and it is mother's job.
Anyway, the world has changed and the children does need their fathers too.
Happy Parenting.....!
David
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Born Innocent
Hi,
This was the main feature in this week, Mind Your Body; a supplement that comes with The Strait Times.
It mentioned that experiences, environment and society will shape a child's perception of what is right and wrong, according to a psychologist.
I totally agreed with the editor that we, parents, should be a busybody for our children's sake.
In case you missed it, here is a summary of some key messages....
Consistency is key to imparting values you want your child to have.
Here is a few pointers on how parents can influence their children's moral values:
- Show, do not just tell
Younger children understand the concepts of love and care best in the form of hugs, kisses and other forms of physical intimacy.
- Engage his empathy
We should use feeling laden statements to reinforce the child's ideas about what is right; eg. You were so kind when you shared your cookies with your classmates.
- Dig behind the bad behaviour
Children sometimes behave badly to test the limits, to express their anger or to seek attention.
- Do as I do, do as I say
Parents need to share their values with their children. How parents behave also modifies the child's perceptions of right and wrong.
- Teach accountability
Children should learn that their actions have consequences. Typical children will show remorse, feel guilt and learn from their mistakes.
I know most of us may feel that it is easy said than done but you must find the time and commitments to want to do it, in the first place.
Happy parenting........!
David
This was the main feature in this week, Mind Your Body; a supplement that comes with The Strait Times.
It mentioned that experiences, environment and society will shape a child's perception of what is right and wrong, according to a psychologist.
I totally agreed with the editor that we, parents, should be a busybody for our children's sake.
In case you missed it, here is a summary of some key messages....
Consistency is key to imparting values you want your child to have.
Here is a few pointers on how parents can influence their children's moral values:
- Show, do not just tell
Younger children understand the concepts of love and care best in the form of hugs, kisses and other forms of physical intimacy.
- Engage his empathy
We should use feeling laden statements to reinforce the child's ideas about what is right; eg. You were so kind when you shared your cookies with your classmates.
- Dig behind the bad behaviour
Children sometimes behave badly to test the limits, to express their anger or to seek attention.
- Do as I do, do as I say
Parents need to share their values with their children. How parents behave also modifies the child's perceptions of right and wrong.
- Teach accountability
Children should learn that their actions have consequences. Typical children will show remorse, feel guilt and learn from their mistakes.
I know most of us may feel that it is easy said than done but you must find the time and commitments to want to do it, in the first place.
Happy parenting........!
David
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
'O' Level Examination 2009
Hi,
Jas just started sitting for his 'O' level examination and it will only end on 13 Nov 09.
Based on some discussion with my friends, I was surprised to find that 'O' level exam. was considered the toughest of all exam; ie even 'A' level, Poly or University exam. are considered easier...!
Well, it does not really matters as I know that Jas was motivated and has put in considerably effort over the past few months.
Whatever the outcome, we will shop for the next level of education..... JC or Poly.
Importantly, he has put in his efforts and did not laze around or has bad attitude towards the preparation for his exam.
So we are proud of him and we believe his efforts will pay off in due time.
So parents out there, be supportive and not be so 'kiasu' about the whole episode of exam.
I was a bit annoyed when I read in the papers that the PSLE Maths paper was tough and some children + their parents were upset about it.
Come on, the children has to learn how to deal with such circumstances and move on to the next exam. paper.
Besides, if it is true, the authorities will moderate the results else there could be more than 50% failure rate....... and it would not be allowed.
Anyway, good luck to all the 'O' level students though it is more on your efforts than luck...!
David
Jas just started sitting for his 'O' level examination and it will only end on 13 Nov 09.
Based on some discussion with my friends, I was surprised to find that 'O' level exam. was considered the toughest of all exam; ie even 'A' level, Poly or University exam. are considered easier...!
Well, it does not really matters as I know that Jas was motivated and has put in considerably effort over the past few months.
Whatever the outcome, we will shop for the next level of education..... JC or Poly.
Importantly, he has put in his efforts and did not laze around or has bad attitude towards the preparation for his exam.
So we are proud of him and we believe his efforts will pay off in due time.
So parents out there, be supportive and not be so 'kiasu' about the whole episode of exam.
I was a bit annoyed when I read in the papers that the PSLE Maths paper was tough and some children + their parents were upset about it.
Come on, the children has to learn how to deal with such circumstances and move on to the next exam. paper.
Besides, if it is true, the authorities will moderate the results else there could be more than 50% failure rate....... and it would not be allowed.
Anyway, good luck to all the 'O' level students though it is more on your efforts than luck...!
David
Monday, October 5, 2009
Find Time For Your Kids
Hi,
I was walking past our nearby park with my wife the other day and noticed my son playing street soccer by himself.
Immediately, I told my wife that I would like to have a game with him as I used to teach him soccer when he was 6 or 7 years old. Though it was against my doctor's advice on not to play impact sports due to my back left knee.
I just could not help it as it brought back memories of our time spent on the soccer field.
I was not properly attired for it but I told myself that I will take it lightly and just be the goalkeeper.
But.....
We ended up playing a simple one-on-one street soccer instead. I broke my old slippers and played bare footed...... also, could feel the pressure exerted on my left knee and I was not even wearing a knee guard to protect it.......
Suicidal ....?
Well, I enjoyed myself and have a good workout though I did not go all out at all .......
Importantly, Jason and I enjoyed ourselves and I have not lost touch of my soccer skills.....ha...ha....
Jason was also kind and did not rough me up .... and he always went to pick up the soccer ball when I kicked it out of court even though it was on my side of it.
In short, do find time to play with your kids ....... good for bonding and some physical exercise too!
Here is a photo of me and Jack taken inside the street soccer court wen we had a break. Jack was having his walk and we let him in for a short while but he was not interested to play with us.....ha.....ha....
I was walking past our nearby park with my wife the other day and noticed my son playing street soccer by himself.
Immediately, I told my wife that I would like to have a game with him as I used to teach him soccer when he was 6 or 7 years old. Though it was against my doctor's advice on not to play impact sports due to my back left knee.
I just could not help it as it brought back memories of our time spent on the soccer field.
I was not properly attired for it but I told myself that I will take it lightly and just be the goalkeeper.
But.....
We ended up playing a simple one-on-one street soccer instead. I broke my old slippers and played bare footed...... also, could feel the pressure exerted on my left knee and I was not even wearing a knee guard to protect it.......
Suicidal ....?
Well, I enjoyed myself and have a good workout though I did not go all out at all .......
Importantly, Jason and I enjoyed ourselves and I have not lost touch of my soccer skills.....ha...ha....
Jason was also kind and did not rough me up .... and he always went to pick up the soccer ball when I kicked it out of court even though it was on my side of it.
In short, do find time to play with your kids ....... good for bonding and some physical exercise too!
Here is a photo of me and Jack taken inside the street soccer court wen we had a break. Jack was having his walk and we let him in for a short while but he was not interested to play with us.....ha.....ha....
I have a bit of soreness on my left knee and lower back but it was worth it........
David
Monday, September 28, 2009
Give Your Children Support In Their School Exams.
Hi,
It is that time of the year again but Jason is sitting for his 'O' level exams. in about a month's time.
It is well known that when the children are having exams., the parents also get stressed or even more stressed than their own kids......ha.....ha......
Yes, I have been through it but we must learned to let go eventually and just be there to support them...... by encouraging them and ensuring that they have enough rest too....
What do I mean?
Guide them to adopt a systematic approach to studying for their exams and not a last minute rush. Teach and help them to come out with a schedule for revision and eventually they should be able to do it themselves.
Encourage them to study wisely but also let them have some free time to rest their brains.....eg they should still exercise or watch TV, etc.....
Jason sometimes asked me to wake him up after 30 minutes of power nap but then when he could not wake up, I just let him sleep on as it seems like he needed the rest badly. He has overslept for more than an hour a few times.
I told him that I rather he be healthy and well rested than struggled to study if his body and mind are not up to it.
I was more hands on and gave more guidance when Jason was in primary school but I gave him more independence when he started his secondary schooling.
I was pleased when he handed me a revision schedule last night and asked me to help put it into the PC and print it out for him. Well, my efforts in teaching him to do a revision schedule has paid off.
Many a times, I re-assure him that no matter what results he gets, as long as he tries his best and gives his best shot, we are happy and supportive of his actions. We will then move on and look at the options available for his next stage of education; eg JC or Polytechnic.
I know it is tough to let go at times and the tendency to nag at them when you see them not studying enough from your perspectives.
Lay the foundation well when they are young and they should be able to manage it on their own.
Happy Parenting.....
David
It is that time of the year again but Jason is sitting for his 'O' level exams. in about a month's time.
It is well known that when the children are having exams., the parents also get stressed or even more stressed than their own kids......ha.....ha......
Yes, I have been through it but we must learned to let go eventually and just be there to support them...... by encouraging them and ensuring that they have enough rest too....
What do I mean?
Guide them to adopt a systematic approach to studying for their exams and not a last minute rush. Teach and help them to come out with a schedule for revision and eventually they should be able to do it themselves.
Encourage them to study wisely but also let them have some free time to rest their brains.....eg they should still exercise or watch TV, etc.....
Jason sometimes asked me to wake him up after 30 minutes of power nap but then when he could not wake up, I just let him sleep on as it seems like he needed the rest badly. He has overslept for more than an hour a few times.
I told him that I rather he be healthy and well rested than struggled to study if his body and mind are not up to it.
I was more hands on and gave more guidance when Jason was in primary school but I gave him more independence when he started his secondary schooling.
I was pleased when he handed me a revision schedule last night and asked me to help put it into the PC and print it out for him. Well, my efforts in teaching him to do a revision schedule has paid off.
Many a times, I re-assure him that no matter what results he gets, as long as he tries his best and gives his best shot, we are happy and supportive of his actions. We will then move on and look at the options available for his next stage of education; eg JC or Polytechnic.
I know it is tough to let go at times and the tendency to nag at them when you see them not studying enough from your perspectives.
Lay the foundation well when they are young and they should be able to manage it on their own.
Happy Parenting.....
David
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